Confidant

Although I know it’s unhealthy, I can’t help but to hold everything in. Sometimes, I let it show like how I am really feeling and what is up. And it might sound fake, but I do not give a fuck. Most of my trust is confided in three things: my stuffed animals, Hashem (G-d), and Sukie. I know that no matter what, they will, or can not ever tell, knowing such things, I feel confident in sharing so much with them. It is not that I have hardcore trust issues; I am just scared of backstabbing bitches I have yet to meet. After seeing how fake some people are, it’s like harder and harder to really trust anyone anymore, you know? But, when I need feedback no matter what he says, I trust my dad. I do hate to admit it, but he does give good advice, and I do like talking to him. He always tells me one day he won’t be here for me to talk to him anymore. He knows I hold so much in and there is so much I have yet to tell. My dad always offers advice or asks what’s going on. I take advantage of the opportunity I have right in front of me I guess. He is right. One day, he won’t be here for me to talk to anymore. Slowly, but surely, I am learning that the answer to all my problems does not lie on the lacrosse field, in my poems, or under my sheets. The answers lie in words, words I have yet to hear.